The Strength To Be Weak

Oct 6

It's easy to edit our social media lives, carefully curating each post to show ourselves at our best. With automatic filters and a little AI, we present our ideal selves online.

But have we considered the temptation to edit and filter our real lives in the same way?

As a follower of Jesus, sometimes I've felt obligated to present a false appearance of strength:

I wanted to let my light shine before others so they would see my good deeds and glorify my Father in heaven.
I know a good name is more desirable than great riches.
In everything, I should set an example by doing what is good.

We fear it would look bad to confess to unresolved sin, persistent struggles, and feeling distant from God. But when we start pretending, it backfires. Concealing our flaws harms our connections, our churches, and our souls.

Are our close friends really fooled by our attempts to fake happiness? And if we're living behind a façade, we live as if we can be known or loved - but not both at the same time. By keeping everyone at a distance, we lock ourselves into loneliness. To face our greatest struggles, we need help — not isolation.

Avoiding vulnerability can also reveal a lack of confidence in God. It suggests we need to misrepresent what God has done for us so that God can help someone else.

But is that how God revealed himself in the Bible?

Consider the Apostle Paul. He was wholeheartedly committed to God. Yet in 2 Corinthians 12, he openly confesses to the church that he faced a struggle he could not overcome.

As he agonized over this problem with God, it was revealed he would always live with this weakness.

But neither did God abandon Paul to struggle by himself.

Paul recounts that Jesus told him, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness."

By faith, Paul accepts the Lord's perspective, repeating it as his own way of life.

We read in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10, "Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may reside in me. So I take pleasure in weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and in difficulties, for the sake of Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

We were afraid that God would reject us for our weakness.

Perhaps that's the lesson imparted to us by our parents, peers, or pastors.

We saw them wearing masks - or insisting that we wear ours - and felt we had to follow their example. Or worse, they lured us to be transparent, so they could control us.

But Paul shows us a better way.

He acknowledged his lack, his need, and his emptiness. In doing so, he found Christ and fellow believers were with him, helping him.

In doing so, he is aligned with a primary theme in the Scriptures:

Genesis teaches us that God is the Creator, and we are limited, finite creatures.
The Proverbs guide us: “Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy” (28:13).
The Psalmist assures us: “God heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3).

Open the Bible to any random page; you'll likely find that God allows us to see how his people failed him and each other. It's not very impressive, yet God repeatedly offers salvation, transformation, and friendship.

Imagine a Christian community where vulnerability isn't tolerated but celebrated as a strength.

Our prayers would sound like the Psalms: raw, honest, genuine, and wholehearted. Our fellowship would look like the early church: close, connected, and cared for.

We need vulnerability, but it isn't always possible. It requires knowing people who prove themselves worthy of our trust. But even if our friends betray us, I am confident that God will never turn away from us.

Do you feel like you're in a dark room with no way out?

If we've hidden our problems for a long time or been rejected whenever we've tried to seek help, it can feel like any step forward is too difficult.

Here's what I've found helpful:

Acknowledge Your Struggles: Admit to yourself that you have areas of weakness. Journaling has helped me to unlock self-awareness.
Experience God's Care: If you don't have the words to be vulnerable, use the unfiltered prayers of the Psalms to get you started. You can pray, "I want to tell you the truth, but I can't. Help me."
Admit It's Hard. Tell God - and trustworthy friends - "I want to share more, but it's tough." See if they respond with frustration - or tenderness.
Start Small: Share something minor and evaluate the response. Do they listen? Show compassion? Maintain your confidence? This will help you identify who can handle more significant disclosures.
Find Trustworthy Friends: Identify a small group, family member, or friend with whom you can be completely honest.
Be a Trustworthy Friend: When someone is vulnerable with you, honor that trust by being empathetic and accepting.
Pay Attention To Your Heart: After you've been vulnerable, take time to reflect on the experience. How did you feel? How has it changed your relationship with others - and with God?